Yesterday was a big day for Logan and I. We went to the Optimologist. And for the first time as a mother I felt true guilt. Not the kind that you feel when you give a spanking and feel a little bad afterwards, the real kind. The kind that because of me it's possible he could have issues with his eye forever. I'm sure like Rick most of you think I'm being hard on myself, but as a mother I can't help but feel responsible. Here's the story: About a year ago we noticed Logan crossed his eyes a lot. I happened mostly when we wanted him to smile for a picture. We thought he was making a funny face at us. But I think I was in denial that he really had a problem. It was pretty noticeable. Fast forward to now. He still does this but it has gotten better. So at his ped check up I had him take a look and he refereed us to the eye doctor. That leaves us at yesterday. Turns out he has Accommodative esotropia. It's an outward turing eye, that happens when the child is trying to focus on far away objects and occurs mostly when they are daydreaming, tired or ill. That's why it's only sometimes noticeable. Here's where I come in. Since I waited to bring him in it may be harder to correct the muscles that may be permanently damaged. He was told yesterday that the first step is he needs to wear glasses. He was SO upset. His reaction made me heart break. I wanted to cry, but had to make it a no big deal situation. And I know it's not that big of a deal. It's really common and worst case scenario is surgery (which is a mild one at that) But Logan is really taking this hard. I feel awful. I know that I could not change the fact that he has this, but maybe if I got him in one year ago well...We do think it has gotten better so hopefully with the glasses it will help that much more. Here's the thing, He'll hate them because they will not help his vision, in fact the Dr. said he will most likely complain that he sees worse in them. So how do I concince my 4 year old that he needs to wear them?
Sometimes our hearts get tangled And our souls a little off-kilter Friends and family can set us right And help guide us back to the light. ~Sera Christann
5 comments:
That's a hard one, but you really should not be so hard on yourself, kids cross their eyes, Riley ALWAYS did when we were taing her picture too. You just have to be strong for him. Riley asks me for glasses (when she sees the Lens Crafter comercial), when I asked her why, she said she wants glasses like grandma...do you want Riley to talk to him..they really hit it off at the b-day party..hehe...I really hope everythign works out, keep us posted on his progress.
I am so sorry April. I think as Mom's we tend to blame ourselves for anything that happens to our children it's natural. If you would have known that it was something that needed to be fixed you would have taken him in sooner. But now you have and everything will be fine. He still has his sight. I would just make a big deal about the glasses. Have a glasses party where you invite a few friends and everyone has to wear glasses. Make them out to be really cool. You can really play this up. How long does he have to wear them? It will be hard at first but in the end it will be worth it. Give your self credit I think that you are a great Mom!
Riley would LOVE to come to a glasses party!
I'm so sorry that you feel guilty, nobody can make that feeling go away...I hate that guilty-mom feeling!! But know that Logan will be fine!! You are a fantastic mother!! ...and Logan is so freakin' cute that glasses will just be his latest accessory!! haha...Carys said he still looks hot! (I'm just kidding...but she did say that she likes his glasses!)
thanks everyone it's nice to get positive responses he'll be fine and since mommy is getting glasses he's a lot happier about it!
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